This is the 100th post on Runners High
I’m a fan of extremes. I enjoy polar opposites. How bad can bad get is one of my favorite questions – when it’s funny. I’m listening to someone sing the Ave Maria over Schubert’s melody very well. I think it’s Loreena McKennitt. It’s a transcendent piece of music, of which there are about four in the world. Strangely, they’re all religious pieces except for Gin and Juice. Normally I don’t “listen” to music. Normally it’s just there as a mild opiate, but occasionally, as in the case of the Ave Maria, I can’t push it to the background. No matter how many times I hear it I fall into the intricacies of the talent and skill necessary to do it right. And by doing it right I mean a top notch soprano. It probably should be sung by a castrato but that’s creepy. There’s a recording of one of the last castratos from the early twentieth century with his picture next to it. Dude looks like Tony Soprano (wow, I didn’t even see that pun coming until it was on the page) but sounds like an eleven year old boy. It makes my skin crawl. Anyway, if it’s not going to be sung by someone with a tight control of a high register and without genital mutilation then let’s derail this train. Biz Markie sings the Ave Maria. Pee Wee Herman sings the Ave Maria. Steve & Edie sing the Ave Maria. Ashlee Simpson sings – not lip syncs – the Ave Maria. I’m sure the Vatican, the Catholic League, Opus Dei, the Southern Baptists, the Sons of Abraham, and even Al Qaeda would agree that Ashlee Simpson singing the Ave Maria would be blatantly anti-Catholic and a crime against humanity. If locking Ashlee Simpson in The Hague can bring Catholic and Protestant, and Jew and Muslim together then isn’t that what the holidays are all about? It’s what Martin Luther King, jr. died for.
4 comments:
The recording you've been listening to is Sarah Brightman. I think it's beautiful as well.
I can't even believe you mention Ashlee Simpson. Her fifteen minutes are so over.
Ave Maria always makes me cry. It's so embarrassing. Except when my mother sang it, that made me laugh. If Ashlee Simpson could make the pope cry, she gets my vote.
Alvin and the Chipmunks sing Ave Maria. Once again, you make that song way cool the way you write about it.
Catholic school upbringing makes that bit of music connect to sexual repression and a stifling of any and all creative expression. At least I'm not bitter.
The aria (is that the right word? Calling on JSG and diabelo)that I love I can only identify through a Ghiradelli's commercial that's been playing on TV. What is that called?
P.S. Happy 100th!
Ashlee Simpson should have to register her voice, like convicted sex offenders register their residencies.
Ave Maria - simple melody - a bitch to sing. I haven't heard the Brightman rendition.
Post a Comment