Thursday, February 12, 2009

It's Not Logical. It's Psychological

The husband of one of MJ’s colleagues, CL, died recently after a battle with cancer (I think). CL is having a wake for him. She’s calling it a get together, but whatever. She’s the type of person that puts up a strong front, and doesn’t really let other people in emotionally. She wants to give the impression that she’s in control; that all her bases are covered. From what MJ told me about the invitation/notification of the event it sounds like CL doesn’t really care one way or the other if people show up, but it would be nice. I know that’s not the case. I know that she desperately needs people to show up, and not just to celebrate her husband’s life but to put the grief aside for a little while. When MJ told me about the wake I didn’t want to go. I may have met the guy once. I’m not really sure. CL is nice enough, but I may speak to her about twice a year. Then I started thinking about it and came to the realization that if you can help someone out in their time of need then you probably should, especially if all it entails is an hour or two of standing around and talking to people. I don’t think there will be any heavy lifting. I used to have a plan if MJ goes before I do – there was a contingency if I had something to do with her going. I planned on shutting down completely. I would watch television, eat fast food, and drink beer. It would be like Leaving Las Vegas, only more depressing. Then LMJ came along and that plan got scrapped, but as soon as she’s eighteen that plan goes back into effect. I know that I’m surrounded by people that care for me, and they will do everything they can to get me through the emotional devastation. I don’t know if CL is surrounded by people like that. I hope she is. I hope she’s as lucky as I am, but in case she isn’t. I can sacrifice a Saturday afternoon in the name being human.

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