Via The Rectum Transmitted With An Apparatus

Sweet wounded Jesus! How did I miss this? Almost twenty years ago in the highly underrated, underseen (it’s a word, I just wrote it) film House Party, Pops played by the late Robin Harris asks, “Who would give a public enema?” At the time they were making a cheap pun on the name Public Enemy, but that’s irrelevant because we have a definitive answer, Tyra Banks. Apparently, giving someone a colonic on television some how qualifies as acceptable “content”. Why didn’t she just have Rebecca Romijn on again to talk about how difficult it is to be pretty? This wasn’t a colonoscopy like Katie Couric did on television for cancer awareness. This wasn’t even Tyra Banks getting her poop shoot cleansed. It looks like it was some chick that got paid to do it. For those that don’t know,

Colonic irrigation (CI) is a procedure in which very large quantities of liquids are infused into the colon via the rectum through a tube, a few pints at a time, in an effort to wash away and remove its contents. CI differs from an ordinary enema which involves infusing a lesser amount of liquid into the rectum only. A "high colonic" may involve the use of twenty or more gallons pumped by a machine or transmitted with an apparatus that relies upon gravity to achieve its purpose. Liquids used in colonics may include coffee, herbs, enzymes, wheatgrass extract, or many other substances.

How long is it until this is a show unto itself? It could be a game show. There could be different categories: guessing the liquid that’s being sprayed, producing the most volume, producing the least volume, withstanding increased pressures, making a coroner vomit, X-treem Jabeñero division. I could go on. How do I copyright this, even though I’m sure the Japanese and/or Germans have been doing a show like this for decades? Tyra knows Oprah. I seriously doubt Dr. Oz was consulted. Every time I think we’ve hit rock bottom, there’s another sub-basement. I’m just spit balling here but what about America’s Next Top Moyle?