Is Hooters Open Yet?

Isn’t this the way it always is? In the excitement of getting my computer back I skipped my morning trip to the gym and got to work before 8am – with nothing to do. I didn’t come totally unprepared. I knew my tech guy was driving up from Orlando so I brought a book. Unfortunately for me, I only had about 70 pages to go, and about 65 of those 70 pages were the climax so they went quickly. Now it’s 9:20 and I have absolutely nothing to do. I’m writing this with a pen on a legal pad. I’m about a hundred words in and my hand is already starting to cramp up. I’d go downstairs and buy a newspaper but I’d get angry if there wasn’t something interesting I wanted to read, and I don’t want to waste 75 cents or whatever a newspaper costs these days. The interweb has obliterated print media. I could walk across the street and get a Starbucks, but I don’t want a coffee right now. I’m still caffeinated up by my home brewed, and with the spring weather it’s not cold enough for a hot coffee and not hot enough for an iced coffee. I’m not hungry. I’m just bored out of my mind. I’d talk to other people in my office but they all suck. Where the hell is Tom? Writing longhand takes up so much space. I don’t know if I’m even going to get 250 words on a page. Not to mention this looks like it was written by the Unabomber if he had Parkinson’s. My desk is clean. That’s how much there isn’t to do here. I can get cable television in my office. I can lease a plasma from Lincoln. If the cable guy was here today he’d get to go home early. I’d order the “Hook Me Up” plan. I wouldn’t let him leave until there weren’t any channels I didn’t get. I’d be watching Elisabeth Hasselbeck scream at Whoopi Goldberg in Farsi on the Iranian broadcast of The View. This is so bad that I want to do my job, which brings us back to square one: I can’t do my job without a computer.