There's Something Wrong with that Boy.

The South Carolina Democratic Party has rejected Stephen Colbert’s application to get on the state’s Presidential primary ballot. The party’s “executive committee” doesn’t want to be part of a comedy routine. Do people from South Carolina realize that they are people from South Carolina? South Carolina Democrats’ crowning achievement was attacking Fort Sumter and starting the Civil War. After that it’s Strom Thurmond running on a master race platform in 1948. For all intents and purposes South Carolina is Mississippi with better beaches. South Carolina has never been anything other than North Carolina’s personal bitch, yet they have the arrogance to act like they’re above Stephen Colbert. This is why the Democrats are worthless and why I will be writing in Dick Cheney and Ann Coulter for President and Vice President next year.

On a more positive note, we have 5 scientific reasons the zombie apocalypse could happen. It’s strange that I saw Cracked Magazine’s list this morning because I had It’s a Hard Knock Life stuck in my head and I was thinking about Little Orphan Annie, who was a zombie orphan, and a sequel – Annie II: Annie-nihilation. In case anyone is hung up on the fact that Annie was a zombie just look at her eyes and the eyes of her zombie dog Sandy. No irises plus no pupils equals the undead. It’s basic arithmetic. In the sequel Daddy Warbucks has been murdered and an adult Annie is out for some zombified revenge – asses will be kicked, names will be taken. Annie will gain superhuman strength and stamina when she eats brains, but she’s not going to be a reluctant zombie like Blade is a reluctant vampire (hybrid). Iron Chef Masaharu Morimoto will be her personal chef at the Warbucks compound. He’ll prepare the brain snack packs Annie needs in her quest to find her benefactor’s killer(s). Here’s the cool part. The killers are Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy. Ron left Hermione for Harry. So Hermione, attracted to his steely gray eyes and fat bank account, turns to Malfoy. He likes her because she’s from the wrong side of the tracks and she’s feisty. The story isn’t fleshed out right now, and that’s probably a good thing. Sarah Jessica Parker can reprise the stage role that made her famous.