I am bored, uninspired, and I am regretting committing to this thirty days of blogging thing. I wish I hadn’t promised MJ that I would limit the hardcore foul language on this blog. Not because I feel like swearing, it’s just a really easy way to up the word count. Eddie Murphy once said that you can’t give a curse show, but I beg to differ. I’m going to ramble in this post. I’m like the kid that didn’t study for the essay exam but doesn’t want to turn in a blank sheet. Actually, I’m not like that kid; I am that kid. At least I was up until tenth grade, at which point I stopped caring what my teachers thought of me. I didn’t like high school. I liked being a teenager. I had more than my fair share of fun.
Side note: There’s a stupid Cadillac commercial with some 40 something chick asking if when I turn my car on does it return the favor. First of all, I drive a truck. Second, white women don’t drive Cadillacs. White men over 50 and black men over 15 drive Cadillacs – if they don’t drive trucks that is.
Anyway, I had more than my fair share of fun as a teen, and I never got arrested. Doing either one of these things is easy. Doing both of them together is threading a needle. I’m thinking of trying Ernest Hemingway’s muse, liquor. But if I get drunk alone in the dark on a Thursday night I don’t really see a way of avoiding getting screamed at by MJ. We’ve been together for the better part of twenty years, and I’m almost certain she has a problem with alcoholics crawling into bed next to her, even if it is for art. Men call this attitude hateration. I think women call it not being a complete moron or adulthood. Liquor is a fickle muse. Hemingway killed himself, but he’s remembered as a great writer. I can’t think of a great writer that wasn’t a massive substance abuser or was born with at least one massive psychosis. But if I get hammered I’ll wake up with a hangover, a screaming wife, and a screaming baby. Sorry, but my art isn’t worth that. Good sense sucks.
5 comments:
Man, I was feeling your exact pain tonight and just wrote whatever idiocy came to mind. I too played with the idea of a good slug of Patrone to get things lubed, but damn if I couldn't remember where I put it. Middle age sucks the big blue ones.
I admire both of you.
Props to you for not cursing or drinking. The post didn't suffer at all for it.
I agree with MJ. I love that commercial, btw. Maybe I'll even try a Cadillac for my next car. Keep up the good blogging!
I agree that the post worked out fine without your needing to enter a 12 step program, but then we're only into this thirty days thing for less than a week. If you're really planning to keep up with this, maybe you and Cora need to go halfsies on a bong.
By the way, the car thing? My mustang is my pony, and we both get a ride.
You are amazing
and thanks for the entertainment, must go tend to my child now- and yes I will stay clear of the bong and Patrone for now. Although my son might find it great play since he loves falling down and laughing. Three is a great age
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