Bromide Tablet Anyone?

There was no reason for me to eat as much as I ate today. It was worse than yesterday. I have no willpower when it comes to things slathered in gravy. I ate too much dressing, too much turkey, and too much mashed potatoes. I didn’t do anything else today but eat, sleep, drink beer, and watch television. The only constructive activity I was involved in was putting a new turkey breast into the oven. As bloated as I feel at 8:30, the chances of the remnants of the apple pie making it to tomorrow morning are not very good. I even skipped out on going to get the Christmas tree. I used the cooking turkey as an excuse. Publix didn’t have any fresh ones so MJ got a frozen one, and I had to stay home to re-season it as it cooked. It wound up being pretty good, not as good as last night’s full bird, but not bad either. I think I’m going to start calling turkeys colonels and turkey breasts lieutenant colonels. Anyway, this was the first year since 2000 that I didn’t go get the tree. I don’t have my truck anymore so MJ was able to take the van and have the dude put the tree on the top. It’s eliminated a yearly brawl. Every year we would get a tree on Black Friday and MJ would blame me for messing it up or not helping the guy put it in my truck. Not only was I supposed to do all the work, I was supposed to be happy about it. It’s no longer a problem now that my dad took the truck off my hands. Now I can watch a turkey cook, drink beer, and watch football the way the founding fathers would want me to. Maybe I should have gone on the tree trip. It probably would have saved me 3500 calories. I’m going to have to run to Orlando and back just to get back to even. Gravy season is in full swing.