Fossils

I almost couldn’t believe what was happening. After a great workout this morning, I stopped at Publix to get some refuelage. I got a Met-Rx Big 100 bar and a Diet Dr. Pepper – two items. Two is less than ten, which I only point out because not everyone understands how the express lane works. I got behind this old guy with what I thought were exactly ten items. I counted. I thought the old lady in front of him was done and leaving. I didn’t realize her stuff hadn’t been bagged yet, that she had shopped for the month, and that they were together. The checkout lady was more than a little annoyed, and I was on my way. Then the annoying transcended into the surreal. I kid you not. After the checkout lady rang up all their stuff she gave the dude the total. $78.49… in the express line. He looked at her like she asked him if he voted for Obama. Then he pulled out his wallet, reached into the billfold, and pulled out a check. All I could think was NO WAY! It was blank. He asked for a pen. The checkout lady took a moment to calm herself and pointed to the pen attached to the counter. This couple was in their mid-seventies at the oldest. I’ve written about this before, there’s no such thing as old people anymore, not like this anyway. These people were in their thirties during the 1960’s. They were young when Neil Armstrong stepped on the moon. They grew up on technology. There are all kinds of drugs nowadays to keep people focused. There’s a guy named Bob that works out at the Y who’s 87 years old, still runs the River Run every year, and flirts with the female trainers. I thought to myself, these people are trying to be stereotypically old, like they read about it in a book. That’s the only explanation. The checkout lady bagged up their groceries and sent them on their way and then apologized to me. I told her it was no problem and then asked if she minded if I paid by check. She laughed and the long line of people behind me did too. I bet that’s the last time I’ll see anything like that.